I can't believe it

So, here it is. I’ve been doing this everyday for a year. Somedays I didn’t write much, but it still went out. I thought about listening the major events of the last year, but that more of an undertaking than I feel up to. It’s too much to think about really. I don’t know what I’m going to make of any of this until it’s over, until we’re well and truly out of it. Even as the world goes on, and more and more people in my life get vaccinated, I’m still having a hard time believing that normal is coming. I don’t know if this is a pessimistic thought — I just don’t see how things go back to the way they were before. Maybe whatever comes next is better. But right now the future is unknown, and it’s scary not to know things. I’m not excited for the future yet, just scared of it. The present isn’t great, but I’ve mostly got a handle on how things work. But there’s no hiding from the passage of time, the future doesn’t care if I’m ready for it. So I guess I’ll keep on writing this thing everyday for now, until I feel like I don’t need it anymore, or until it becomes something else, I don’t know. 


he stepped into his bowl??? and then he yelled at me to rescue me???? I love him so much, and he is not very smart. 


The marvelous Jessica Walter, Arrested Development’s Lucile Bluth died yesterday, and I threw on the first season because I wanted to enjoy her performance in one of my favorite shows. Arrested Development is so formative in terms of my sense of humor, and so influential to the wave of single cam sitcoms that came after it, it’s hard to overstate its importance. Not all of the jokes hold up, but the rhythm of the show, the way it cuts, the way it builds bits through repetition, is still perfection. Jessica Walter has so many good lines in it, things that I see quoted and memed constantly, things that will live in my brain forever. It’s fun to see her actually say the words in context. How much does one banana cost Michael, ten dollars? I don’t understand the question and I won’t respond to it. 


It’s a new year, and the first album of 2021 that I’ve really loved is Julien Baker’s Little Oblivious. I’m sure I’ll have more to say about it at a later date.